05 February 2016

Twilight Zone: Nails I

have mentioned in previous posts that I wanted to get round to my experience, good and bad, concerning my nails and about painting and sticking things to them. I mentioned in my first episode of the ‘Stocking Saga’ that I had started to regularly polish and varnish them. This may give the impression, as with wearing daily my stockings and occasionally with suspenders that ‘Abi is out’. But as you can see from the title my Nail Saga (if it comes to that), will run under my Twilight Zone series dealing with girl related ‘stuff’ but without Abi running around in the open. 
As Ed: was rummaging around in my collection of pre-post notes and filing nail related pictures together, the following tale turned up from last summer. I thought I would let you see it now and not to wait for it ‘in sequence’ when I get going on about nails. It will also give me the impulse to pull the rest together. 
Here it is … 

I had one of those near misses today where I was surely tempted to let the cat out of the bag concerning Abigale. We were in the local drug store (German dm-drogerie markt) buying a few things after getting back from a rainy holiday on the Dutch coast. Mrs.A had ticked off the last item on her list and as this store was new to us we just wandered around a bit to see what was on offer. 

As Mrs.A stopped to look at something on a side shelf, I carried on and saw that along one wall nothing but cosmetics (see picture). Quite a collection, all the colours under the sun. As my pulse started to pick up speed I plucked up some non-alcoholic Dutch courage (must be a left over from the holiday) and walked over to the wall. As this was an impressive collection, I set my long range scanners to ‘press-on nails’. I was interested to see if they had a larger selection than our local store. 
A few seconds later my radar informed me that they were off to my right. As there was hardly anyone about I meandered over to see what they had. 
I kept my distance, just looking not handling. 

I found some nails from imPRESS and knew from experience that they are relative easy to remove and therefore painless. I have always been reluctant to cement them on and having the horror of not getting them off without mutilating my nails in the process. 
The problem was I could not see without closer scrutiny if they were large or small (I need large – big hands as well as big feet). I have seen in the net imPRESS nails without any size given, which makes me unsure if they would fit or not. Maybe they have now the complete size range in one package but I’m a little wary without any size info. I have been looking for some time for nails in mint. But there were none there, only orange which I also love and would come back for a better look when I was solo. 

Just then I noticed Mrs.A making for the cosmetic wall a little way off. I stopped looking and while trying to make a mental note of what was there I quickly joined her. 
She was looking at nail varnish. 

I have always tried to animate her to wear it, but she is reluctant to do so due to problems with the removers. She just cannot stand the smell of acetone. With my work in Labs I have no problem with the smell, actually the opposite. It reminds me of my lab experimental days, so the smell wouldn’t put me off wearing polish. 
She mentioned that she had bought a non-acetone based remover, not as good as with acetone but still a remover. I saw this as a chance to get her to try again. I had of course an alternative motive, not only to see her wearing polish again, but there was a good chance I would help her to apply it and then ‘play around’ a bit and get her to do one or two of my nails ‘just’ to see how it looked. This happened once way back in the past, but more about that later. I would have to time it so that we would do it on the weekend and have an excuse to leave it on a while longer. 

So we stood there, she was looking, but not really into it. I had to react quickly before she broke off and said we should go home. I rambled on about the colour selection and that one wears all the colours under the rainbow these days and having different colours on different nails and fancy art work to boot. 
Thinking about it later, I could imagine having a go at nail design myself complementing my dabbling in making Celtic jewellery. Of course I would stick to Celtic patterns, covering nails in knots!
[Ed: get on!]

The main thing was she answered and commented which was what I wanted as we were still there and looking. I moved quickly to level two and started to select vanishes and showed them to her asking what she thought. It must have been a subconscious reaction, and as this was the essie display, I selected the Pastel Love (mint) and said this looks nice and asked her would she like to wear it. 

[Ed: you should mention that exactly this make and colour was your last buy in varnish!]
Yes true, maybe that’s why I choose it. 
If I can’t wear it that often then at least I can see it on her. 

And now I come to the part where I almost let it slip and that would have been the beginning of the end. The answer I got back with the mint vanish was “Mint? Why? I have nothing in mint to wear with it.” 
I had to really concentrate when I calmly said “Yes, that’s true” at the same time as Abigale in my head was letting lose loudly 'But I have! There’s a lovely silk blouse, party dress, leather miniskirt, 5 inch patent leather heels, 4 inch open back sandals, earrings and a sexy bra and panties all stashed in the cellar, including this nail vanish!!'

I was preoccupied for a moment reflecting on what had just happened. I saw the funny side, then the stupidity of it all, followed by a state of overwhelming fatigue in having to constantly keep Abigale under wraps. 
It all must have ended quicker than I imagined as MrsA hadn’t noticed anything amiss. I pulled myself together and choose a number of other colours until she finally went for the essie go-ginza (lavender). Before she could complain about the price, we were off to the pay counter. 

Half a year later, as of posting this, 
the bottle still hasn’t been opened.
I really must get the ball rolling!
[Ed: don’t they have weird names!] 
Yes they do, but the colours are nice.


  1. I have a shoe box full of bottles of nail varnish! I never thought twice about the price I was paying even for my occasional Channel indulgences. I blanch at paying those same prices for a large tin of house paint...

    I first painted my toenails and it was six weeks before they noticed the scarlet gems. My fingernails were painted almost continuously for the decade up to my coming out. Strangely when I was asked to remove it before my GRS exactly four years ago, the need to make a colourful point to the world seemed to vanish and it is now a special occasions thing for me.

    1. Thanks for your story Coline. Yes I think when you were wearing it constantly that you were making a point to who you were, now you don’t have to and therefore your routine is not to wear it so often. I can understand that.
      As I can’t wear it at all, I feel I would what to wear it all the time if I could, but if I could, then I would probably wouldn’t all the time. [Ed: what was that for a sentence!]. No idea but it sounded good..

    2. Long before I was "allowed" to paint them I would spend the day at home with colour dancing at my fingertips wondering when I had to get it off before discovery... A few close calls.

      Then one easter my sister visited with her family and my nephew had black nails and was playing in a band. Well if he could do it!

  2. It's like a trip to the sweet shop, when you're on a diet, isn't it? :-)

    If it's shy help, Kiss do a range of larger size, press on nails. If you're using glue, a coat of clear varnish beforehand - and dry - can help.

    As to Mrs A, there's a product, I think called Quickies, that are nail wipes. They don't smell like regular nail varnish remover and, if you're careful, one wipe will do both hands.

    1. Yes it is like a sweet shop and thank you for rubbing it in!
      I see we have an expert on nails here. Will try out all you suggested.
      With the Kiss as they were stick on with glue I hadn’t considered them till now. The idea with the clear vanish is interesting. I have a big box of ‘raw’ false nails here maybe I’ll try them with a coat upfront. I’m looking at painting and styling them beforehand then sticking them on, but I’m still looking for a good way to do this.
      I’ll check out the Quickies option. Thanks Lynn for the tips. Will start to post on my experience with nails and report how I get on.